The article, written by Lisa Mecham, is a deeply personal essay recounting her marriage to her husband, referred to as G, which began when they met in college at age 18. They bonded over literature, married after graduation, and had two daughters. Life seemed stable as G pursued a medical career and Lisa became a stay-at-home mother. However, around 2005-2006, G exhibited signs of bipolar disorder—erratic behavior, insomnia, and poor decisions—leading to his diagnosis. Despite family denial, Lisa, fearing for her and her daughters' safety, asked G to leave, resulting in a permanent separation. They remained legally married but lived apart for 14 years, during which G stabilized with treatment, rebuilt his career, and maintained visitation with the daughters, while Lisa relocated to Los Angeles, focused on freelance writing, and navigated challenges like the 2008 financial crisis and the COVID-19 pandemic.
In December 2020, amid the pandemic, the couple met in Sun Valley, Idaho—a neutral location neither had visited before—to discuss divorcing without lawyers. Lisa prepared extensively for asset division and finances. Their time together involved reminiscing in a heated pool, skiing on Baldy mountain (where Lisa struggled and vented frustration), and sharing a dinner in Ketchum. Over the meal, G wrote on the bill, "Whatever happens, I still want to be a family," and Lisa agreed, viewing it as an opportunity for a redefined bond rather than returning to the past. They spent the trip reflecting on shared memories, their daughters' lives, and personal growth, with Lisa gaining a sense of empowerment.
A year later, they finalized an amicable divorce without legal intervention. Both had entered new relationships, but they prioritized maintaining a family unit for their daughters in an unconventional way. The story highlights themes of resilience, the impact of mental illness on relationships, and redefining family beyond traditional marriage. Mecham's reflection underscores her journey from fear and conformity (influenced by her Mormon upbringing) to embracing agency and self-defined safety. It's a poignant reminder that separations don't always end in bitterness; sometimes, time and maturity allow for graceful evolution, preserving emotional ties while allowing individual freedom. The unexpected reaffirmation of family amid a planned dissolution feels surprisingly hopeful, illustrating how shared history and children can transcend romantic failure.
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